Hershey Candy Cane Chocolate Bar

Fresh out of the gate is Hershey's "candy cane" chocolate bar, a minty twist on the company's famous twelve-block confection.  Candy connoisseurs may remember that at one time Hershey's offered a "cookies 'n' mint" bar, the demise of which I mourn at least biweekly.  

The reappearance of a mint chocolate bar from Hershey's, even on a limited basis, gives me hope that the spectacular cookies 'n' mint bar will emerge from the retired candy purgatory.  In the meantime, this perfectly acceptable white chocolate bar studded with bits of (you guessed it) candy cane will have to do. 

Plus, I'm already scheming about s'more possibilities. 

Limited/Seasonal Edition Holiday Kickoff!

It's the most wonderful time of the year.  Christmas has a unique way of compelling food manufacturers to issue limited edition/seasonal products.  Something about those 24 days leading up to the birth of Christ, I guess, inspires crackers shaped like snowflakes.  Yeah, I see you, Ritz. More on you later.

Anyway, I promise not to go too crazy with the reviews this month.

Actually, no I don't. Brace yourself.

Cranberry Sprite Zero

Having long been a fan of Canada Dry cranberry ginger ale, I was excited to see another major soft drink brand board the seasonal edition cranberry soda train. (Hmm, not quite sure about that last metaphor, but I think you know what I mean.)

As an unapologetic consumer of artificial sweeteners, I opted for the diet or "zero" version of cranberry Sprite because frankly regular Sprite usually tastes too sweet for me and I would rather expend the calories on chocolate milk.

Cranberry Sprite Zero tastes vaguely of cranberries. Very vaguely.  Definitely far less than a hint and perhaps a tad bit more than a whiff. It's almost indiscernible. 

Anyway, I think you get it. Even diet Canada Dry cranberry ginger ale tastes much fruitier. I can easily take or leave cranberry Sprite Zero.

This all being said, I wonder if my apathy toward this seasonal soda is misplaced.  Perhaps the non-zero version is absolutely bursting with cranberry flavor. 

But probably not. Readers, contradict if I'm woefully incorrect.

Autumnal Holiday Liminality

I'm back after a brief respite during which I celebrated Halloween properly, that is, not by writing but by reading ghost stories, drinking candy corn infused vodka, reprising Natalie Portman's role in Black Swan for various costume parties, and stuffing myself with "fun size" candy bars. 

As per The Rules, I will not begin posting on Christmas/holiday seasonal and limited edition foods until the day after Thanksgiving. In the meantime, there are plenty of products issued in celebration of this nebulous pre-Turkey Day festive period to keep me occupied.  Stay tuned.

Candy Corn M&Ms

A bit late to the game, O'Leary?

Actually, I tried Candy Corn M&Ms last year (meh) and thus was lazy about giving them a second go this Halloween.  In 2012, I liked the vibrant colors but overall considered these candies swollen and sickeningly sweet.  And this year?

Not so much different.  With their very light candy corn flavor, these M&Ms make me simultaneously crave real candy corn and miss real (meaning, NOT WHITE) chocolate.

My prediction is that this year may be the last for candy corn M&Ms because their novelty can't trump their lackluster taste forever.

Caramel Apple Milky Way

Apologies for the blurriness of the photo, which in a way reflects my own uncertainty about this candy bar.  Well, first it is not a candy bar, it is a "bite size" (not to be confused with "fun size" or "bites") version of full-size Caramel Apple Milky Way. Except this product does not exist, which totally deconstructs the idea of bite-size CAMW being the diminutive form of anything. In a way, the candy bar equivalent to Judith Butler's conceptualization of gender performativity, i.e., "the copy without the original."  

Anyhoo, my problem with this candy isn't so much that the (sour?) apple flavor is fake albeit prominent but that once your taste buds start to enjoy it, your consumption experience is over. Yes, you can open another bite size, but, ugh, that takes work.  Why doesn't Mars issue a full-size version of CAMW so that we can have a sustained apple-flavored-caramel-chocolate experience.  Why the tease with the fun size. Not so much "fun" I think. 

Starburst Candy Corn

Candy Corn Starbursts debuted this year and they are not gross. 

I feel like I have to get that out of the way because when I included them on a list of top 10 non-chocolate Halloween candies for the Houston Press, some readers were quite disdainful.  

I understand that the general preference will be for regular Starbursts rather than Starbursts candy corn, but in the spirit of the upcoming pagan holiday, allow yourself multiple objects of candy worship.  Yes, plain Starbursts can be your favorite, but the candy corn version is fun, fruity, and less redolent of high-fructose corn syrup than generic candy corn.  

Brach's and/or quality candy corn are an entirely different story. If you don't like candy corn, there is something horrible, probably incurably, wrong with you.  And if you don't like autumn mix,  you are not welcome in my house.

Reese's Pumpkin

An oldie but goodie seasonal sweet I hope never goes away, the Reese's Pumpkin is larger than your standard Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, and, from my observations, employs richer peanut butter cream.

This to not to say, however, that you should restrict yourself to just one. Pumpkins are most fun in pairs, I think, so why not honor the consumption tradition of the peanut butter cup and eat two at once? Reese's, btw, should offer two in a package to facilitate this practice. Hope they get on that.

Cadbury Screme Eggs

I feel like at some point Cadbury got tired of dominating Easter and set its sights on Halloween.  And while the presence of Hershey and Mars will probably prevent them from ever dominating this holiday, I do give Cadbury props for successfully parlaying its most iconic Easter treat, the creme egg, into a Halloween confection.  How?

Simply by changing "c" to "s" and yellow to green.  A Cadbury Screme Egg,  as I discovered within moments of my taste test, is identical in taste to a  Cadbury Creme Egg. The only two elements differentiating the two candies is the name and the color of the interior "yolk."

I suppose that Cadbury chose green as their Halloween hue because the shift from yellow to orange would be insufficiently dramatic.  That's fine and good, I guess, but now they've completely foreclosed the possibility of using green for a mint-flavored St. Patrick's Day version of the Creme Egg.

Sigh.

Pillsbury's Pumpkin-Faced Sugar Cookies

Not to be confused with Pillsbury pumpkin-flavored cookies.  It's only October 17th and my local Kroger was already very eager to get rid of this "shape and bake" treat and had discounted them to "10/$10." Okay, I'll take one package for one dollar. 

I'm not going to write "baking these cookies couldn't be simpler!" because obviously having someone else bake them for me would be easier. But I will tell you I probably could bake them blindfolded.  Actually, I could probably bake them without even trying, accidentally even, if I tripped, tore open the package, and hurled the cookies into an open oven. 

I put down wax paper on the pan just to feel like I was making some effort.

I remember when I was little thinking that Pillsbury sugar cookies were of a reasonable circumference. Now they are the size of checkers and lend themselves to be eaten by the handful. 

To slow down my rate of consumption I made them into sandwich cookies with store-bought frosting. (Please, like I'm going to waste homemade icing made from unpasteurized milk and Irish butter on these things.)

It worked and I only ate six. 

Russell Stover Dark Chocolate & Coconut Cream Pumpkin

Russell Stover really gets in the Halloween spirit. Maybe too much so.  During September and October, they offer individually wrapped chocolate pumpkins with more than a dozen different fillings, including, but not limited to: marshmallow, pumpkin pie, strawberry cream, red velvet, caramel, chocolate marshmallow, and peanut butter. I probably won't try them all.

I just might though.

As you can see from the pictures, the Russell Stover chocolate pumpkins lack the nuanced details found in the Snickers squash.  They also are absolutely swimming in packaging. Thus, it's hard not to be a bit disappointed by their diminutive stature when they emerge from the wrapper.

Lots of shredded coconut enabled big coconut flavor, which almost made up for the rather thin, bitter (but not in a classy way) dark chocolate coating.

I would have rather had a Mounds.

Autumnal Peanut Butter M&M's

Ever since the disastrous introduction of the blue M&M, I have especially welcomed the release of M&M's in fall colors, which, thank God, do not include blue. The dark maroon hue also reminds me of my departed friend, the tan M&M, whose resurrection I pray for daily.  

I picked up a bag of autumnal peanut butter M&Ms at CVS.  For baking purposes, I would have preferred plain milk chocolate, but there were none to be found. Also, I find the package illustration of the coy female M&M sipping a latte endearing:

Actually I have no idea if it's a latte. It could be a hot cocoa. But I don't like to think of a chocolate candy sipping on a chocolate beverage.  It's akin to me drinking my own blood. But perhaps brown lady M&M is a vampire, which is not totally inappropriate, given the Halloween release.

Anyway, buy some and use them to make chocolate chocolate chip peanut butter M&M cookies. 

Snickers Pumpkin

Not to be confused with Peanut Butter Snickers Pumpkin.  Let's be precise, people.  I had moderate expectations for the Snickers Pumpkin based on my experiences with Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkins (to be re-reviewed later).  I assumed the themed black wrapper would hold a plain flat nugget of Snickers candy shaped vaguely like a squash. I was wrong.

Yikes, that's a scary grin.  It matches the picture on the wrapper but certainly not the label, for that, my friends, is a jack-o-lantern, not a pumpkin.  Also, Jack's smile is sort of desperate.  Seems like he's trying a bit too hard to jocular and repressing some deep internal melancholia. And speaking of insides:

Things are a bit sticky. And nutty. Crazy delicious, indeed.

Russell Stover "Big Bite" Caramel Apple

The last couple of years I have noticed that Russell Stover, once a smaller, regional candy manufacturer, has been trying to compete with the big boys that are Hershey and Cadbury.  To that end, they have increased their online advertisements and made forays into the world of Halloween-themed confections.  The "Big Bite" Caramel Apple is a successful example.  It is indeed a "big bite," larger than other apple- and pumpkin-shaped seasonal treats and very filling, thanks to a very dense interior of caramel.

I didn't much care that I could barely detect the "apple flavor" because the caramel was so terrific in its own right, with an even consistency and balanced sugar content.  Russell Stover is known for its quality small-batch chocolate and I'm grateful they didn't opt for a lesser variety for the apple's coating.  Unlike other filled treats with questionable cocoa exteriors, the "Big Bite" Caramel Apple tasted as if it had been dipped in a melted gourmet milk chocolate bar, then drizzled with dark chocolate of high cacao content.  

It has also come to my attention that a nut-covered variant is also available and I will try to locate one for a later post.  'Til then, I'm more than happy with the "plain" chocolate "Big Bite" Caramel Apple. 

Pillsbury Pumpkin Cookies With Cream Cheese Chips

I don't expect much from Pillsbury in terms of baking products around Halloween (recipes--that's a different story altogether).  Their pumpkin print cookies are nothing more than sugar cookies imprinted with cheap dye and for similar reasons, their ghost cookies probably scare me in a way that isn't intended.  New this season, however, is a pumpkin with cream cheese chips style of separate-and-bake cookie. "All right, Doughboy," I thought to myself when I spotted it on sale at my local Randall's.  "I'll give you another chance."

The flavor is vastly superior to  that of any other non-chipa-fied type of cookie (e.g., oatmeal, sugar) I've tried from Pillsbury.   With strong squash notes with ample support from cinnamon and nutmeg, this product is essentially a mild pumpkin pie in cookie form.  If that was all that Pillsbury promised, well, then, it'd be an easy win. The supposed inclusion of cream cheese chips, however, created a reasonable expectation that there would be more than, like, two to a cookie.  Not the case.  Doughboy, I don't regret my purchase, but next time around amp up the chip-to-dough ratio.

Halloween Season

And so it begins.  It's October, my self-imposed moratorium on premature discussion of Halloween foodstuff has been lifted (by, um, me) and now it's time to, as Jerry Seinfeld might say to "Get. Candy."  There is no rhyme and reason to the order in which I will review all the potentially amazing limited edition/seasonal Halloween foods on this blog.  There is a commitment, however, to trying and critiquing as many treats as possible. Stay tuned.

Seasonal Ghiradelli Square: Pumpkin Spice Caramel

Seasonal square from the sweet folks at Ghiradelli. This post marks the "official unofficial" start to the most active time of the year in terms of limited edition/seasonal product launches: the holidays. Hurrah!

I usually make it a policy not to blog about Halloween foods until after October 1st as to curb vulgar premature consumption. However, I am suspending this ban in the case of Ghiradelli's new Pumpkin Spice Caramel squares because they are not explicitly for All Hallow's Eve (though, of course, their early fall release makes them conveniently available for trick-or-treat shopping) past mid-September.

I encountered the seasonal chocolate while I was visiting the Ghiradelli shop in Downtown Disney in Orlando, Florida. An appropriately cheery young salesclerk was handing out free samples of the Spiced Caramel Square and I am happy to report I was able to restrain myself from asking for more than one. (That's more than I can say for the fannypack-adorned mater behind me.)

The square survived a rather bumpy and overheated flight back to Houston, where I sampled it with some cold milk.   Nothing radical in terms of flavor: Ghiradelli has basically infused their milk chocolate caramel square with some cinnamon and nutmeg.  A festive chocolate, nonetheless, and probably best paired with a spicy beverage such as chai or ginger tea.

Although I wouldn't buy an entire pack to serve as is, I am curious about the baking possibilities.  Incorporating the square into a dough or batter  seasoned with allspice and more cinnamon and ginger might make for a more stimulating sweet.

Top 5 Limited Edition Summer Ice Cream Flavors

A terrific ice cream treat is an easy and satisfying end to a summer supper, but while you're at the store, scan the frozen cases for new ice cream flavors. Again lured by the "limited edition" label, I have been exploring the world of seasonal ice creams. Here are five to try:

5. Peaches 'N' Cream (Turkey Hill). On my list of favored fruits, peaches fall somewhere in the middle. Add any sort of fatty sweet dairy to them and they significantly improve in ranking. With peach ice cream as well as peach slices, Turkey Hill's Peaches 'N' Cream seems at risk of peach overload, but surprisingly, it works quite well. Pick up a half gallon for June 21, National Peaches and Cream Day.

4. Triple Vanilla (Baskin-Robbins). Yes, yes, you can't find this at the grocery store. Also, the limits to this summer edition are far shorter than for other seasonal flavors: It's available only in June. So hurry! The trifecta of premium vanilla, vanilla bean and French vanilla (which provides those sunny yellow streaks) is a vanilla addict's dream and makes a wonderful base for sundaes.

3. Strawberry Shortcake (Breyer's). Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Shortcake Greek Frozen Yogurt is what you eat on a weeknight in a small bowl after a healthful dinner of steamed salmon and kale. Breyer's Strawberry Shortcake ice cream is what you cram by the scoopful into your mouth to alleviate some of the heat/heartburn from those jalapeño margaritas and spicy beef fajitas you had during weekend happy hour.

2. German Chocolate Cake Spectacular (Dreyer's). You must know that German chocolate cake is delicious, but did you know it's not from Deutschland? I think Sam German would be proud of this flavor, which combines dark chocolate cake chunks, chocolate ice cream and "caramel coconut swirl." That last component was lacking in coconut flavor, so I sprinkled some sweetened flakes on top.

1. Candy Bar Pie (Ben & Jerry's). Currently sold by the cone and cup at Ben & Jerry's shops, Candy Bar Pie might transition to pint status this summer. But it's still limited batch, so if you want to nurse your summer heartbreak with a triple scoop of peanut butter ice cream (aren't those four words in combination glorious?) studded with fudge flakes, nougat bits and pretzels, go now.

Limited Edition Nestle Oatmeal Scotchies

Read my Houston Press review of Nestle's Oatmeal Scotchies.